Happy Thanksgiving!!! Was enjoying a little quiet time this morning before going for my turkey trot (gotta make room for all those deserts) and when it came to the point where I ususally jot down a couple of thoughts I decided to look back one year ago and see what I wrote in my journal 365 days ago. Here it is....it's a gratitiude list. I have to say if these items stay on my gratitude list the rest of my life I should continue to enjoy the ride.
My Gratitude list:
1) Today
2) A conscious contact with God
3) God's grace
4) Living sober
5) A loving family
6) Home
7) Resources to meet needs
8) Good health
9) Network of friends
10) Faith / church
11) Sanity
12) Life experiences
13) Healing wounds
14) Freedom
15) Golf
This list seems very appropriate for a guy that is getting ready to turn 42. I'm very much looking forward to the second half of my life and what God has planned.
Keep it in the fairway!!!!
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Supernova CTB 1
Tonight, November 11, 2010, Keeley, Candice and I went over to UK to hear a lecture for astronomy enthusiasts. Attending this event was an extra credit assignment for Keeley. But, I think "daddy" enjoyed it more than the others.
The lecturer was discussing SUPERNOVA's. Now I have to be honest, I did not understand 1% of what the lecturer was saying. But the content was amazing. I simply sat there in awe of God's creation. Yes, all I could think about was "Are you kidding me"? GOD - the person that I have a personal relationship with and who loves me designed all of this!!!
Everyone enjoys a good star gazing opportunity. The next time I get a chance to star gaze I'm going to also use that time as an opportunity to talk to God and thank him for all that he does for me everyday I'm allowed to live on this Earth.
Keep it in the fairway.
The lecturer was discussing SUPERNOVA's. Now I have to be honest, I did not understand 1% of what the lecturer was saying. But the content was amazing. I simply sat there in awe of God's creation. Yes, all I could think about was "Are you kidding me"? GOD - the person that I have a personal relationship with and who loves me designed all of this!!!
Everyone enjoys a good star gazing opportunity. The next time I get a chance to star gaze I'm going to also use that time as an opportunity to talk to God and thank him for all that he does for me everyday I'm allowed to live on this Earth.
Keep it in the fairway.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
Who is God?
I was taught very young that church was an important part of life. I knew this from how my Mom lived her life and the fact that we were at church, it seemed, every time the doors were opened. My Grandfather was a minister and to me he was larger than life when he preached. I'm not sure I really understood who God was, but I had this concept that God was a man that lived above the clouds and not only did he watch everything I did, but he would also punish me if I did anything wrong. This concept of God stayed with me for a long time.
Once I began to make poor life choices I became ashamed off myself and felt like there was no way God was ever going to forgive me. This shame caused me later in life to turn my back on God. I kept going to church and occasonally I threw up fox hole prayers like God please help me and I promise I will make better decisions. My spiritual life went into some very dark places to the point where I had completely given up on ever having a personal relationship with God. See I still had that childhood concept that God was a punishing God and I had not experienced God's grace.
Today, because I have sincerely asked God for forgiveness of my sins and turned my life and will over to God he has revealed himself to me as a loving and perfect father. He cares for me like no other person on Earth and instead of being just a man that lives above the clouds I now see that God is in everything and walks with me daily.
When we come to understand God properly, as a heavenly father, and begin to depend on God more He draws closer to us and we draw closer to Him. God, thank you for loving me during my dark spiritual years and never giving up on me as one of your children.
Keep it in the fairway.
Once I began to make poor life choices I became ashamed off myself and felt like there was no way God was ever going to forgive me. This shame caused me later in life to turn my back on God. I kept going to church and occasonally I threw up fox hole prayers like God please help me and I promise I will make better decisions. My spiritual life went into some very dark places to the point where I had completely given up on ever having a personal relationship with God. See I still had that childhood concept that God was a punishing God and I had not experienced God's grace.
Today, because I have sincerely asked God for forgiveness of my sins and turned my life and will over to God he has revealed himself to me as a loving and perfect father. He cares for me like no other person on Earth and instead of being just a man that lives above the clouds I now see that God is in everything and walks with me daily.
When we come to understand God properly, as a heavenly father, and begin to depend on God more He draws closer to us and we draw closer to Him. God, thank you for loving me during my dark spiritual years and never giving up on me as one of your children.
Keep it in the fairway.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Addiction
I have been experiencing a battle in my own mind for months. I have some sober time under my belt. But, it is very hard for an addict to completely eliminate their addiction from their mind. See the addiction, or disease, centers in our minds and I truly believe to a certain degree we are all addicted to something. Obviously the degree of addiction or drug of choice varies. The drug of choice can vary from alcohol and drugs to work, exercise, sex, power, money and greed. My drug of choice was alcohol. I have a feeling there are many people with whom I come into contact with daily that have an addiction, but are not willing to accept they have a problem and that their addiction is hurting themselves and others.
My cravings for alcohol have gone away. This is by the grace of God. But not a day goes by that I do not think about having a drink. In order to manage this battle between good and evil, inside my mind, I have to do a lot of reading, a lot of praying and I have to think back to what it was like for those around me when I was in the middle of my addiction. On the surface or from the casual on-looker my life probably has not changed much in the last 3 1/2 years, but ask those closest to me and I feel certain they will respond that I'm not the same person at all.
I owe this second chance to the program of Alcoholics Anonymous, a strong network of family and friends and a loving God, all who never gave up on me and loved me until I could love myself. This may sound very selfish and may be for another blog someday, but I really had given up hope and had turned my back on God. The shame of this caused me to hate me. Thankfully there was a solution.
"For deep down in every man, woman, and child, is the fundamental idea of God. It may be obscured by calamity, by pomp, by worship of other things, but in some form or other it is there. For faith in a power greater than ourselves, and miraculous demonstrations of that power in human lives, are facts as old as man himself". (AA, page 55)
So if your struggling with an addiction, if your life is full of chaos, if you feel God has turned his back on you and life is not worth living, your not alone. Millions feel this way today and Millions felt like you feel and are now living in recovery. All you have to do is have a desire to change and be willing to ask for help and I promise you God will show up in your life. Your life will change, for the better, and you will eventually be able to look back in the rear view mirror and say wow how did I do that.
This blog today may not make a whole lot of sense too many, but I do feel better just saying out loud that I'm not healed and never will be completely healed. But, I did get up today, thanked God for an opportunity to live another day and I really do love living in recovery.
Keep it in the fairway.
My cravings for alcohol have gone away. This is by the grace of God. But not a day goes by that I do not think about having a drink. In order to manage this battle between good and evil, inside my mind, I have to do a lot of reading, a lot of praying and I have to think back to what it was like for those around me when I was in the middle of my addiction. On the surface or from the casual on-looker my life probably has not changed much in the last 3 1/2 years, but ask those closest to me and I feel certain they will respond that I'm not the same person at all.
I owe this second chance to the program of Alcoholics Anonymous, a strong network of family and friends and a loving God, all who never gave up on me and loved me until I could love myself. This may sound very selfish and may be for another blog someday, but I really had given up hope and had turned my back on God. The shame of this caused me to hate me. Thankfully there was a solution.
"For deep down in every man, woman, and child, is the fundamental idea of God. It may be obscured by calamity, by pomp, by worship of other things, but in some form or other it is there. For faith in a power greater than ourselves, and miraculous demonstrations of that power in human lives, are facts as old as man himself". (AA, page 55)
So if your struggling with an addiction, if your life is full of chaos, if you feel God has turned his back on you and life is not worth living, your not alone. Millions feel this way today and Millions felt like you feel and are now living in recovery. All you have to do is have a desire to change and be willing to ask for help and I promise you God will show up in your life. Your life will change, for the better, and you will eventually be able to look back in the rear view mirror and say wow how did I do that.
This blog today may not make a whole lot of sense too many, but I do feel better just saying out loud that I'm not healed and never will be completely healed. But, I did get up today, thanked God for an opportunity to live another day and I really do love living in recovery.
Keep it in the fairway.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Life in the Hereafter
I cannot believe it has been 7 weeks since I made my last post. I could sit here and come up with a 100 excuses why, but I have a feeling once said out loud my excuses would seem rather silly. So, rather than wallow in self pity let me share something powerful I read this week.
"But, we see Jesus, who made a little lower than angels, now crowned with glory and honor because he suffered death, so that by the grace of God he might taste death for everyone. In bringing many sons to glory, it was fitting that God, for whom and through whom everything exists, should make the author of their salvation perfect through suffering. Both the one who makes men holy and those who are made holy are of the same family. So Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers". (Hebrews 2:9-11)
I'm sure when the reader reads the title "Life in the Hereafter" they are going to assume I'm going to share some far fetched opinion of what I expect life will be after death. Instead I'm simply going to say I feel like I'm living in the hereafter. In many ways I was living in death before finally turning my will over to the care of God. Now, I'm not going to sit here and tell you I'm perfect. I like to think that today I focus on spiritual progress, not perfection. I'm grateful to have experienced God's grace and that He sent his son to experience suffering and death. It means everything to me that when I came to the point, in my life, where I thought I had lost everything and I asked for His forgiveness of my sins and said to Him I do not deserve to live He said do not worry, you are my son and we are of the same family. I honestly feel God spoke to me and He said because you have experienced death while living and asked for forgiveness I'm now going to allow you to live in the hereafter.
Not everyone who reads this may understand what living in death means. However, there are millions of people living in death today. I do assure you anyone who reads this has experienced suffering and there is a solution. The solution is letting go and let God take the wheel. I know the hereafter will bring many highs and lows. But, the good news, for me today, is that the lows are not as low as they once were and I know Jesus knows me and He is not ashamed to call me brother. That was what hit me square in the face this week when I read this passage. I have a brother and he knows all my shortcomings and yet he is not ashamed to call me brother!
Keep it in the fairway.
"But, we see Jesus, who made a little lower than angels, now crowned with glory and honor because he suffered death, so that by the grace of God he might taste death for everyone. In bringing many sons to glory, it was fitting that God, for whom and through whom everything exists, should make the author of their salvation perfect through suffering. Both the one who makes men holy and those who are made holy are of the same family. So Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers". (Hebrews 2:9-11)
I'm sure when the reader reads the title "Life in the Hereafter" they are going to assume I'm going to share some far fetched opinion of what I expect life will be after death. Instead I'm simply going to say I feel like I'm living in the hereafter. In many ways I was living in death before finally turning my will over to the care of God. Now, I'm not going to sit here and tell you I'm perfect. I like to think that today I focus on spiritual progress, not perfection. I'm grateful to have experienced God's grace and that He sent his son to experience suffering and death. It means everything to me that when I came to the point, in my life, where I thought I had lost everything and I asked for His forgiveness of my sins and said to Him I do not deserve to live He said do not worry, you are my son and we are of the same family. I honestly feel God spoke to me and He said because you have experienced death while living and asked for forgiveness I'm now going to allow you to live in the hereafter.
Not everyone who reads this may understand what living in death means. However, there are millions of people living in death today. I do assure you anyone who reads this has experienced suffering and there is a solution. The solution is letting go and let God take the wheel. I know the hereafter will bring many highs and lows. But, the good news, for me today, is that the lows are not as low as they once were and I know Jesus knows me and He is not ashamed to call me brother. That was what hit me square in the face this week when I read this passage. I have a brother and he knows all my shortcomings and yet he is not ashamed to call me brother!
Keep it in the fairway.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Pass It On
This week has been extremely challenging in many ways. Some ways I can not mention here, but let's suffice to say if every week of my life was as challenging as the last 5 days I'm not sure I would be very spiritual. There were a few "a ha" moments this week that I recorded and I experienced one this morning I would like to share.
This "a ha" moment is a little self-promotion, but I do think the message is a good one. This morning, Saturday, I went for a jog and was having some mental warfare with myself so while jogging I played the "gratitude" game. This is where you alphabetically come up with some things you are grateful for. I made it to about letter "O" before my mind wandered off somewhere else. The coolest thing about this game is it makes me stop thinking about myself and alters my thoughts on others.
Upon returning from my jog Candice said the girls want Krispie Kreme. So, I ran down to the store and while in the drive thru one my old boss' pulled up behind me. I said good morning. Once ready to pay I offered to pay for their breakfast. The attendant asked if I knew them and I said yes. Before I pulled away I said when they pull up please tell them to "Pass It On" and do something nice for someone else today.
Again, I know this is a little self promotion and I wish I could say I thought like this all the time, but I don't. BUT - I can tell you that my entire outlook on the day changed on my ride home. So, hopefully between "a ha" moments and "passing it on" I may be able to increase my spiritual sweet spot.
Keep it in the fairway.
Chris
This "a ha" moment is a little self-promotion, but I do think the message is a good one. This morning, Saturday, I went for a jog and was having some mental warfare with myself so while jogging I played the "gratitude" game. This is where you alphabetically come up with some things you are grateful for. I made it to about letter "O" before my mind wandered off somewhere else. The coolest thing about this game is it makes me stop thinking about myself and alters my thoughts on others.
Upon returning from my jog Candice said the girls want Krispie Kreme. So, I ran down to the store and while in the drive thru one my old boss' pulled up behind me. I said good morning. Once ready to pay I offered to pay for their breakfast. The attendant asked if I knew them and I said yes. Before I pulled away I said when they pull up please tell them to "Pass It On" and do something nice for someone else today.
Again, I know this is a little self promotion and I wish I could say I thought like this all the time, but I don't. BUT - I can tell you that my entire outlook on the day changed on my ride home. So, hopefully between "a ha" moments and "passing it on" I may be able to increase my spiritual sweet spot.
Keep it in the fairway.
Chris
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Spiritual "sweet spots'
I was watching golf on t v and heard one of the announcers say "notice where he made contact with the ball, with his driver, that my friends is on the sweet spot". Golf clubs have sweet spots, baseball bats have sweet spots and I know I have a sweet tooth that works over time.
But, do we have a spiritual sweet spot? Is there a place where we can always go and feel like we are more spiritual or closer to God? Some of the most common answers might be when we are outdoors enjoying nature, on a jog or a walk, or when we are in church.
For me when I think about my spiritual sweet spot, several places come to mind. The first place that comes to mind is my back porch, early in the morning, after a jog when I have my quiet time. I also experience moments of peace and serenity when on a golf course. I rarely get upset with my golf game and take it one shot at a time and try to always remember that if I'm on a golf course life is not so bad. And then there are those random, everyday moments when I sometimes find myself overwhelmed with emotions and have to take a few seconds to thank God, for being God. I did this once this summer, we were at a little league championship game and I got all caught up in the moment and my heart just became overwhelmed with gratefulness. I had to fight off tears of joy just watching all the coaches, players, parents, friends and family getting into the game. Don't know where that came from but I really enjoyed that moment.
I guess what I'm trying to share is that any place, any where, any time we can turn any moment into a moment of spiritual gratitude. We do not have to say anything out loud. We can just, in our silence, thank God for being God and giving us the opportunity to enjoy that moment.
I'd like to wrap this up by challenging us all to find that one "a ha" moment every day for the next 30 days and keep a log of what your "a ha" moment was that day. Who knows you may find your spiritual "sweet spot" will grow bigger.
Keep it in the fairway,
Chris
But, do we have a spiritual sweet spot? Is there a place where we can always go and feel like we are more spiritual or closer to God? Some of the most common answers might be when we are outdoors enjoying nature, on a jog or a walk, or when we are in church.
For me when I think about my spiritual sweet spot, several places come to mind. The first place that comes to mind is my back porch, early in the morning, after a jog when I have my quiet time. I also experience moments of peace and serenity when on a golf course. I rarely get upset with my golf game and take it one shot at a time and try to always remember that if I'm on a golf course life is not so bad. And then there are those random, everyday moments when I sometimes find myself overwhelmed with emotions and have to take a few seconds to thank God, for being God. I did this once this summer, we were at a little league championship game and I got all caught up in the moment and my heart just became overwhelmed with gratefulness. I had to fight off tears of joy just watching all the coaches, players, parents, friends and family getting into the game. Don't know where that came from but I really enjoyed that moment.
I guess what I'm trying to share is that any place, any where, any time we can turn any moment into a moment of spiritual gratitude. We do not have to say anything out loud. We can just, in our silence, thank God for being God and giving us the opportunity to enjoy that moment.
I'd like to wrap this up by challenging us all to find that one "a ha" moment every day for the next 30 days and keep a log of what your "a ha" moment was that day. Who knows you may find your spiritual "sweet spot" will grow bigger.
Keep it in the fairway,
Chris
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