Daily Living Amends

There are thousands of self help books, philosophies, guides and ways to living well. Some may call this a wholesome abundant life. What has worked most effective for me over, the last 3 years, is a 12-step program. I have not been an A+ student, but they say "It's progress, not perfection". Today is August 1st, the 8th month, and I like to use the calendar as a way to sort of focus on each step throughout the year.

Step 8 - Made a list of all the persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.

Easy enough right? Just go back over your entire life, pick out those you have harmed and become "willing" to make amends. There is no action here. The action comes in Step 9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

I snuck ahead to step 9 because this "amends" thing was on my heart this morning. My heart is overwhelmed with gratitude today and I know this is because I have done the work to get to this point in my life. Today, I try to immediately recognize when I have harmed others, been out of line or maybe reacted to a situation inappropriately. In my previous life I was so self-centered I actually never realize when I was hurting others because I could not get passed thinking about myself.

I'm learning - slowly, that saying I'm sorry (and meaning it) is not that difficult to do. Call up the person you have harmed, invite them to coffee, lunch, golf, etc. and get one on one with them and clean your side of the street. Sometimes, if the person is far away write them a letter and say I'm sorry.

In all cases, whether face to face, in a letter, or just performing a daily living amends, what we are doing is publicly apologizing, asking for forgiveness, promising to do better, today and going forward, and most importantly we are putting another human beings feelings ahead of our own. We are saying to them I'm willing to go to any lengths to repair the damage I have caused.
For a self-centered guy like me that is a psychological change.

BIG QUESTION! Have we also done this in our relationship with Christ? I know the first time I ever did this God was #1 on my list. I had completely turned my life against God and decided he had dealt me a back deck of cards and so rather that trade in a few cards and make them better, I just ran on self-will and turned my back on him. I was a big hypocrite for too many years.

Today, I feel I have repaired the damage I caused in my relationship with God and he has forgiven me. I have also repaired many relationships I had to here on earth. I continue to make living amends, daily. This is not a process that occurs over night. For many of us it is a process that we must continue to concentrate on every day. That is really the rest of our lives, but as I have come to learn today is a gift, tomorrow is a dream, and yesterday is gone forever so all I can really do is focus on living well today.

Keep it in the fairway.

Chris